I once worked in a hospital where students from the local college did their MT internship in our office. We had to check and correct their work. On more than one occasion, I had to leave the office to keep from cracking up in front of the student. Here are a few.

Dict: The wound was closed with 0 chromic catgut.

Trans: The wound was closed with Oklahoma catgut.

Dict: The patient was referred to Dr. Sexauer for definitive treatment.

Trans: The patient was referred a sex hour for definite treatment.

Dict: The culture grew out two different organisms.

Trans: The culture grew out two different orgasms.

These are the three that stuck in my mind. Wonder why!!! They would be hard to forget.

The two good one's I had this past week were "the patient is to drink plenty of clear water" the doctor then laughed and stated she hoped the patient always drinks clear water! The other one was an elderly female patient that had fallen and suffered several bruises, one of which was on her right breast. The doctor dictated "breasts were symmetrical with good range of motion" She then clarified that she meant she had good range of motion of her upper and lower extremities! At least these little slip-ups they make can give us all a little chuckle throughout the day!

Just a few more funnies.......

"ducks" used for ducts

"cabbage" used for CABG

1. Do MT Agencies or outsourcing MT organisations in USA, hire only female MT's for their In-house or at home Mt work??? Please advise.
2. Do male MT's outnumber female MT's or is it vice-versa. What is the ratio ???
3. I assume - for 2nd shift (3.00 noon to 11 pm shift) & sometimes even maybe 3rd shift, Male MT's are preferred anywhere, in the UK or US. Please advise.
Need replies from experienced MT's to my Queries posted on 23rd and 24th August.
Waiting for replies. Thanks and waiting for replies. Will appreciate replies from Somara too.

I had two today that made me wonder if the doctors pay any attention to what they are saying sometimes:

Reason for consultation: Gunshot wound to the head.

Trauma history: The patient has no trauma history and no history of head injury.

(I guess a gunshot wound is not traumatic?)

Reason for consultations: Seizures

Past medical history: The patient has no history of seizures or syncopal episodes.

??? Hmmmm... Maybe they were imagined? hehehehehehe

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SgrmtnHoneybee




[This message has been edited by SgrmtnHoneybee (edited 24 August 1999).]

Here's a couple that struck me funny today!

The patient lives at home with a wife. (one would only hope that it is his own wife and not someone else's, eh?)

He weighs eighty-one hundred and fifty-two pounds. (Jeeze, how did they get him to the hospital, by crane?)

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SgrmtnHoneybee

Had a funny one tonight.

"This 89-year-old male was brought to the ER by his mother."

Boy, I hope she wasn't doing the driving!!


[This message has been edited by Diane (edited 04 September 1999).]

How about "the patient does not smell,I mean smoke." Makes you wonder if the patient really did smell!